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2013/09/14
2013/09/13
TO ASK NOW AND THEN
Am I able to let my
loved ones go anytime?
No matter how much I
love them. Precisely because I do love them
and do not mistake clinging (to the strings attached or to my conceptions about
how should things be) for love.
With whom do I have this
liberty?
Do I allow change to occur?
At any time and in any form?
Questions to see how
free my relation to the people, and yes, to life itself at any given moment.
A practical test.
2013/09/05
JUNKYARD AT SUNSET
A theme that never
fails to fascinate me.
Rusty metal
misleadingly so smooth looking in the evening light. Like a sleeping beast.
Exuberant life in forgotten colors. Bits and pieces of things past. Plastic. A
wild collage. Chaotic, tragic. Inspiring.
Limbo between the ending and a new beginning.
A meaningless
meaning.
(Photos:
2013/08/23
CHEWING GUM
Meditation at the
dentist. The only way for me to bear what feels like some infernal sequence of
torture is letting the mind wildly wander. Take, for example, the phrase “chewing
gum.” A foreigner who had learned what to call the firm, fleshy tissue covering the alveolar parts of either jaw and
enveloping the necks of the teeth might understand it as chewing one’s
gum(s). Even more confusing are the words that are both a verb and a noun such
as “rose” or the Turkish word “yüz” (which means face, hundred, swim and to
skin). As if our imagination hung us all of a sudden out to dry, or maybe was
fed up with inventing a word for each and every thing and so hurriedly huddles
together the remaining things to be named regardless of their relevance. A
strange economy.
Come to think of it, languages’ vocabularies may as well have
been developed in the various dental chairs of the world.
ALICE’S RABBIT AND THE MISER
I watched
him hurrying awkwardly. Already running late, he was performing a
mysterious choreography which cost him further time. The frantic victim of the
poor time-management. “You look like the Rabbit in Wonderland” I said, laughing.
What an
inspiring observation these beating-the air behaviors are in someone else (as
opposed to the acrid feeling of being in their grip oneself).
There seems
to be a strong relation between hurry and its derivative, worry, and the
resources both psychological and material.
The more anxious
we are, the scarcer it feels they are, and eventually get to be.
Like money
in the hand of the miser.
Or time. As
long as you see it as an external oppressor, like the rabbit sees his chain
watch, you will desperately try to ignore it until the last minute.
Or you can pay
regard to your inner rhythms and walk gracefully.
This is the
difference between running like a beheaded chicken (as we say in Turkish) and
being a well adjusted dancer; The difference between hurry and excitement.
"So be calm
and act counterintuitively, openhanded with what you’ve got. Time, money, love,
care.. Spend (not waste), give away and offer,” I said to myself, quietly satisfied
with my train of thought when the black sunglasses he left on the table caught
my eye.
2013/08/19
MORNING TEA
Let things
change for they do anyway along with your interpretation of them. Don’t seek
the impossible by attempting to create constant reference points, only to be
frustrated, disheartened, and bitter once they lose their initial
impetus. To remain alive, creative and committed invest in the appetite for
life instead. Let it be the hearth fire. Things and the way you focus on come
and go. Let them be like firewood. Then you can welcome change as the air that
inflames the fire.. I found myself saying this while sipping on my morning tea.
2013/08/16
OPEN SESAME!
How I love
those moments of sudden lucidity!
The wheat separating from the chaff so effortlessly, so neatly that one wonders
why it took so long for such a clear picture to appear.
But
apparently you must be ready, or else, you’ve painted yourself badly into a
corner so that this clarity occurs as a deus ex machina of sorts.
Howsoever,
there you are a calm, impartial spectator of an ongoing power struggle within
between light and darkness. What has thus far been a murky, paralyzing amalgam,
begins to disentangle into its constituents. Sub-characters with strongly
conflicting traits. And you see..
that there’s
nothing wrong with embodying diametrically opposite features. They are only problematic when jumbled, when neither black nor white exists in its own
right but together compose a dull gray. A muffle of energy, vitality, and joy.
As soon as
they are polarized, recognized, and fully owned, a dynamic interplay begins to
replace the former absorption.
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